Diary Excerpt #52

"Had I not created my whole world, I would certainly have died in other people's."
~Anais Nin

This is how I feel.
I'm worried I'm going to drown.
I'm afraid of being forced to join in.
Because I know I will die.

I'm not like you.
Or her
Or him
Or them
Or that.

And I don't want to be, I won't pretend.
But is there a place in this world for people like me?
For dreamers and thinkers,
for lovers and make-believers?
For tea party-goers,
for happily-ever-afters,

I can't find the niche'.
I feel like the star peg trying to go through the round hole.
And I don't know what to do.
There is advice coming from all sides,
and all of it sounds like it should be followed.
But I'm so afraid of taking a wrong step,
of heading down to the doldrums, from which I can't return,
that my feet are stuck to the floor.

What would you do?


  1. Oh, my darling diana!
    I'm so sorry I have been gone. A part of me has died when I found out that I might lose you forever.

    Here's my new home now.

    Of course you are not like another. You will never be because you are special. And the world may be over crowded but there will always be a place for you. For your beauty. For your heart.


  2. The most important thing is to listen to your own heart, if you do that you will never make any wrong decisions. And even if something feels like a wrong solution, later on you will find that it was exactly what you needed at that time. (This is what I've noticed).

    This world is a hard place for us dreamers and thinkers, but I think we are the ones who fill in the cracks, the ones who make life a little more magical for ourselves and for others.

  3. You're not alone.

    For dreamers and thinkers,
    for lovers and make-believers?
    For tea party-goers,
    for happily-ever-afters...

    Being in London with the recent riots, believe me, if I could have a city of dreamers, and lovers, and tea party-goers and storytellers I would. There is very much a place for you. Nothing good comes easy. You just have to swim for brighter days, and sometimes the tide is against you. You just have to swim that bit harder ;) x

  4. That Anais Nin quote utterly sums up a post I wrote recently [http://sparklesandcrumbs.blogspot.com/2011/07/no-im-not-lucky-im-blessed-yes.html]. Have faith - I didn't believe it either, but there is a place and a people for the daydreamers and the Peter Pan-believers. Keep your heart true, my darling, and true love and high adventure will appear :) xxx

  5. Yes, there is a place for us. But it is not in a niche; it is in the sky, on the road, in the meadow with flowers that reach up to your waist.

    [Thank you for the Anais Nin quote, too. It struck a chord with me.]